Current or former residents of the South are eligible for this group. Let's have a REUNION!!!!!!

[dixiegrrrrl]

36. Boy howdy, are you ever in for an adventure..

tis a whole different way of life.
I am surrounded by Republicans, and worse, where I live, but thankfully people here live by the rules of Southern behavior.
Folks are very nice and polite on the outside, and unless you know them quite well ( which takes years) you will not know what they are really thinking. They strike up a conversation at the drop of a hat, everywhere. And they ask what I considered to be personal questions..
where are you from, what does your husband do, ( they don't think to ask what YOU do,but feel free to tell them, in vague terms)
and they will ask "do you know so and so, "or "are you related to __________"
What they are trying to do is to "place " you, to figure out how to relate to you. It sounds nosy to those of us used to a different culture, but is considered a polite necessity down here.
Relationships are based on kinship or connections, and they talk about people a LOT.
For instance, they will start out talking about someone who had a car accident, say, and suddenly go into that persons entire genealogy, for the past 3 generations, which sounds like the most boring babble you ever heard, esp.since you can't get a word in edgewise.
except it is not babble, it has a meaning, it is a social lubricant and gets to be downright fun to listen to.
You will be asked what church you go to. If you do not go to a church, it is best to say "I was raised Methodist"
unless the person you are talking to is a Methodist, then you can say "Presbyterian" unless you ARE a Baptist, for real, then say that.
Everyone will be happy, they have "placed" you.
You will NOT be asked about politics at first conversations. Religion and politics are not topics of discussion unless you know someone very well. It is considered more important to be polite and mannerly and social, and folks know that topics of politics, religion and race are not a good idea if you do not know someone very well.
You WILL hear people say jaw dropping crap, eventually, once you have talked to them more than 3-4 times.
Tis best to react as any well bred person would ,when some one has accidentally farted.
Ignore it, and have a subject changer sentence ready to use. they will get the message and you can still have communication about other things that are more important. That is how I handled the roofer and the electrician and other folks.
confrontation is a no-no. Yelling is a no-no. There are dozens of polite ways to indicate disagreement, but still remain conversational.
I emphasize all this because in a small southern town, half the people are related to the other half, and word spreads rapidly about folks. There is a high value on everyone getting along, cause you never know when you will need help from anyone.
People born and bred down here have 300 years of roots, and it is a strong strong feeling for them. Respect that, and you will go far in being accepted.
Took me years to figure out all this. At first it felt like I had been plunked down in the middle of some weird planet of people who made NO sense at all. But I quickly realized I was the outsider, and it was up to me to learn the language of this "foreign" population.
Would not even think of living anywhere else.

Watch out...the south can grow on you very insidiously, you might not even notice until you move away and find yourself suddenly homesick for it.