Continuation of story with my friend and former lover.... Friend of 50+ years and she was diagnosed with A.L.S.

[3Hotdogs]

Her husband, also a great friend, is diagnosed as "frail." He has been in hospital for 8 days and I don't envision him living more than a year, or even a month more.


The problem - she wants physician assisted dying. Her state does not permit this. Most states require a residence requirement of months before being eligible for assisted dying. We found a state that is 300 miles away that no longer requires residency. This could work out to meet her needs.

The problem: Her husband is in no shape to go with her and be with her at the end of her life. She will likely ask me to assist her in getting there and being with her at the end. I will accept. I am the next closest person in their lives.

How do I prepare myself for this? What do I say before the end? How do I take the 300 mile drive with that in my mind? I can't be in the medical transport van for the trip and I don't want to.

I will have to help her make the arrangements since her voice control is not conducive to telephone conversations. All this will be hard for me if she decides that this is the course she wants to take.

[Tetrachloride]

1. start with basics and lets take a look

water and other refreshments liquid. suggest a thermos because they look nice and can be sealed. i recently acquired 2.

ask the transport company for the best driver , if you know which company.

in the region of hospital, choose a hotel or two.

during the drive, take a break every 2 hours, assuming you are following along.

battery pack etc for phone charging

[Tetrachloride]

2. call a local hospice place and see what they say

it might be different and comparisons in advance will help in the following months.

talk with neighbors or police or HOA if they have a house that needs looking after

pharmacy bag.

6 hours is mighty far by van. this is beyond my medical transport experience.

[Tetrachloride]

3. comfort of your friend during the trip is

my top issue to resolve.

Wheelchair or front seat or flat ?

it seems to me that one more person in addition to yourself and the driver would be nice.

whatever the last wishes of your friend, .. i took those seriously myself tho others didn’t see.

[Grim Chieftain]

4. Oh dear 3Hotdogs

My heart goes out to you and your friends for what you all are going through. Wow. I know this will be extremely difficult for you, but I hope you can take some comfort in knowing you are the one trusted with helping fulfill this final wish.

Please know you and your friends are in my thoughts, and I am sending wishes for strength, peace, and serenity.