Republicans Extend Olive Branch To (Certain) Canadians -- Wonkette

[erronis]

https://www.wonkette.com/p/republicans-extend-olive-branch-to

There's no business like snowbird business.

America’s tourism industry finds itself in a similar boat as the mayor of the fictional New England summer destination of Amity Island once did: How do you get people to come spend money on a beach vacation when you’ve got a gigantic killer shark problem?

. . .

A hundred weeks ago, in February, the US Travel Association warned:

New tariffs on Canada could impact Canadian visitation to and spending in the United States. Canada is the top source of international visitors to the United States, with 20.4 million visits in 2024, generating $20.5 billion in spending and supporting 140,000 American jobs. A 10-percent reduction in Canadian travel could mean two million fewer visits, $2.1 billion in lost spending and 14,000 job losses.

. . .

Nobody with any sense wants to risk their phones being rummaged through, let alone a body cavity, for a short visit to the land of the free.

Republican lawmakers seem to think the solution to us no longer wanting to visit for some strange reason is to make it easier to spend even more time in Gilead with the Canadian Snowbird Visa Act proposed in Congress to make an exception for certain special Canadians.

. . .

Pete Hoekstra, the new ambassador to Canada, thinks it’s time to “move on” from this whole unfortunate Bye America business now that annexation threats from his lunatic boss are “over.” Not that we have it in writing or it would mean anything if we did.

“If the Canadians want to keep talking about it, that's their business,” he told the CBC. “I'm not talking about it, Donald Trump is not talking about it. We've got too much on our plate to move forward because we're all about increasing America's prosperity, safety and security.”

In other words, Canada should consider this whole 51st state fiasco just a silly misunderstanding and water under the bridge. But the problem is there’s still a bloodthirsty Great White shark in the water under the bridge, canonically now capable of revenge, and Steven Spielberg isn’t the one pulling its strings.

[BOSSHOG]

1. Another Republican produced rerun

Fuck something up. Get hurt. Attempt to apply a bandage to a gaping wound. Comfort the wounded. Blame someone else. Return to the studio for a sequel. Groundhog day with a cast of millions of stupid people in tow.